To Every Season

Summer relented while we were in hospital. Friday was hot and sticky, the water like blue glass when we went down there for lunch after a doctor’s appointment that indicated a few more days of waiting for baby. The baby had other plans, of course, and standing smiling in front of the clear blue fjord, for an ‘almost 41 weeks’ photo, we didn’t know we’d be holding her the following evening. But first there was a burger to eat, some more of the hot sun to catch and the idea of ‘she is a few days off yet’ to relax impatiently into. I am learning quickly never to relax into anything where babies are concerned, particularly not impatiently – they’ll just change it up on you anyway.

A few days after the burger by the flat, blue water, we drove home from hospital, suddenly a family of three with a car seat in the back and a tiny person a now permanent part of every equation. Autumn had arrived. The stickiness was gone, the air was cool, rain had set in, and the bright colours of summer had turned a little.

It is remarkable how much can change in just one day, even when you have been anticipating the change for months. This little thing was suddenly a very big part of our household. She was real, visible, constantly present. We were suddenly parents, making it up as we went along, all of the things we had been given or bought in preparation, being used and washed daily. A baby’s arrival seems to be one big planned for, expected shock.

My parents flew out, my Mum having spent a month with us, and it seemed that summer – a season in which we married and welcomed our baby, a season we had so indelibly circled in our minds’ calendars for months, was over. I felt and always will feel, truth be told, enormously nostalgic for a time that was, by and large, perfect. Hot and blue-skied, spent with dresses stretched over a big belly and constantly, wonderfully hungry for the fresh market food and kaffee und kuchen Mum and I went in search of daily. A time spent within this bubble of knowledge that a baby was coming, and part of this sheer excitement pulsing across and around the globe from friends and family as we waited and waited for everything to change irrevocably – it was a ledge we will never, having now leapt off, stand on again.

So she is here, the game changer, the newest character. She is half of me, a tiny Aussie, but a native of her father’s city, a city I chanced upon and chose through love. North Germany just became even more of a home, it became the only home my child will know for a long time.

I have a feeling we will learn a lot from each other.

18 thoughts on “To Every Season

  1. What a wonderful post! It is fun to be a family even when sometimes tiring and lots of guessing is involved. So happy for you and great that you hold the memories before in such a special way. Big hugs of encouragement from central Germany xox Karin

  2. Hey Girl, congratulations and welcome to “having a baby in Germany” world! Feel free to contact me if you have any questions or just want to talk babies (not necessarily auf Deutsch) 😉

    1. Thank you so much. I recall an earlier comment of yours about breastfeeding here – have never forgotten it. You were right!

  3. Must be my favourite post by you, simply wonderful. This one gave me goosebumps (and some watery eyes I have to admit…). All the best to you and your little Aussie/German family in Kiel!

  4. Beautiful post. And strangely enough, season-wise that’s exactly how it was for us last year, though several weeks later: we went into hospital in hot late Summer and came out into a crisp Autumn. Hope everything’s going well and you’re getting the odd wink of sleep.

    1. Congratulations! So wonderfully written.

      My boy will be 4 months old next week! Just yesterday, I was importing photos from my iPad onto my computer and my heart ached for that tiny little baby I brought home with me. He’s so big now! But every day is more and more fun as he grows and discovers his world. You have a lot of wonderful moments ahead of you.

      I second Kasia’s offer – if you ever want to talk baby stuff, I’m here for you too!

      One bit of unsolicited advice — don’t stop moisturizing your body! I did, my milk came in, and I got stretch marks on my chest. 😉

      1. Yes, I have seen your süß little one on your blog and kept up to date with how you guys are doing! I think he looks so much like you. Thank you so much for the offer – we should try one day for a babies in North Germany coffee, na?

        ps: advice taken – good point!

  5. Wenn ich das alles richtig verstanden habe … dann ist wohl jetzt der Zeitpunkt gekommen um zu gratulieren?
    Alles gute zur “dreisamkeit”.

  6. Congratulations, Liv! What a beautiful post for a beautiful time in your lives. Sure wish we could catch a glimpse of that sweet baby girl, but certainly respect your privacy. Maybe you could give us a teensy peek at her little feet? 🙂

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